I haven't felt like posting lately, mostly because there's so much I don't want to talk about. But I was sitting in the B school library and listening to a couple of students compare travel stories and work experience, and I was struck with a sense of loss. It took me a while to figure out why, but i realized it was the same feeling when i chose no to go right to college and when i sent back the letter saying I'd go to Barnard. Not a sense that I had made the wrong choices, but a sense that my options are continually contracting. Every choice that I make has a series of paths that I haven't taken and I feel the loss of all of those. All the jobs I'll never take and the places I'll never live and the places I'll never go and the people I'll never meet. Sometimes its impossibe to be satisfied when I think about how small a portion of the world I'll ever get a chance to see or know.

That being said, I have been pretty satisfied lately. I had a really nice birthday Friday. I made myself French toast and then went to moma to look at the photographs and then chilled at Barnes and Nobles. I met aron for dinner at mesa which was delicious, and I'm really proud of the book I bought him for his birthday which is my birthday. Then I went and chilled with Tracy and Daniella for a while which is always a lot of fun. We did the OK Go dance and made turtle try on tracy's shirts and drank godivas liquor. The bar was a lot of fun and I was really happy to see so many people there but by the end of the night I was totally crashed out. And a couple of people were being jackasses. But mostly I was just tired because we got to the bar so early.

The rest of the weekend was pretty solid. Winter league saturday and we actually won a game. Yay! Babysitting at Tammy's which is the easiest money I'll ever make and I love the kids. Super bowl party at Goose and retail's. That was a lame super bowl though. The commercials were unimpressive and the game itself sucked. I got bored and started reading whatever susan sontag book was lying around. Something about war and empathy. Nice light reading.

I actually got a lot of work done today which was good because i only had one class. I don't even know what day it is. Wednesday? Yeah it must be because i have track tonight. And because i had dinner with leroa monday and dinner with tracy tuesday and that gets us to wednesday. Tracy said she might be up for moving to brooklyn with me and leora next year which would be sweet. I just need to get stupid archstone to tell me when they want me to start. And figure out when i want to start.

If my parents are willing to lend me money and they said they are, i'm really thinking i want to travel for a couple of weeks before i start either a road trip or south america with elizabeth or maybe a short european thing like biking across ireland. I have to figure things out though. I'd love to go with karen but she works and so does leora. Anyway, I'll figure it out.