obsessed
I can't think of anything besides my trip for more than about five minutes at a time. I was in Pittsberg for four days and last night was new years and i've seen tons of people and had a lovely week. But the only thing I've been able to focus on is packing and thinking about all the different scenerios that could play out. I'm pretty sure its not healthy. People keep asking me if I'm excited, but I don't think that that is what this feeling is. It's a combination of anxiety, nerosis, single mindedness, and blind panic. It's living in the future, even if that future is only a few days ahead. It's not a pleasant feeling exactly but its strong.
I've packed my bag almost entirely just to make sure it all fits. It does with plenty of room to spare but its far too heavy for my taste. Which means I can lift it with no problem at all and I could carry it all day. Most of the weight comes from presents so I won't have to worry about that for long after i get there. I should weigh it.
A couple days ago I had a total panic attack, convinced that everything was going to be aweful and that I'd either die on the way over or spend the whole time deathly ill. Funny how I never worry about the plane crashing on the way home, just the way over. Also funny and a little bit sad that I spend 90% of my time anticipating disaster and only 10% thinking about how much fun it will be. When I know that once I get there I'll probably have 90% fun and 10% disaster.
....ok nicki try to think about something else....
Happy new years! I ended up being in MA last night which was nice cause i got to see karen and sarah. Though hanging out with my cousins would have been fine too. I like them. The little ones were out in force with 11 of them under the age of 7. We kept them busy though and managed to not injure any of them perminantly. Which doesn't sound impressive but red rover is a violent game. One poor little one got completely clotheslined and went flying backwards but he bounced right back up. Which is good because his mother was laughing too hard to be helpful. =)
The basketball game was pretty lame this year. My dad and his brothers are getting old and injured and my brothers are both injured and lots of the cousins had their own kids to watch. We still had enough for a full court game but not many subs and it was pretty poor quality. Me and Eric were teaching people to throw a flick so maybe we'll be able to start an ultimate game at some point. If we teach them when they're young, they'll be ready for the ashcroft wildwood team in no time.
There that was five whole minutes of non-uganda thought. Now to go figure out what kind of food i'm going to bring on the plane.
I've packed my bag almost entirely just to make sure it all fits. It does with plenty of room to spare but its far too heavy for my taste. Which means I can lift it with no problem at all and I could carry it all day. Most of the weight comes from presents so I won't have to worry about that for long after i get there. I should weigh it.
A couple days ago I had a total panic attack, convinced that everything was going to be aweful and that I'd either die on the way over or spend the whole time deathly ill. Funny how I never worry about the plane crashing on the way home, just the way over. Also funny and a little bit sad that I spend 90% of my time anticipating disaster and only 10% thinking about how much fun it will be. When I know that once I get there I'll probably have 90% fun and 10% disaster.
....ok nicki try to think about something else....
Happy new years! I ended up being in MA last night which was nice cause i got to see karen and sarah. Though hanging out with my cousins would have been fine too. I like them. The little ones were out in force with 11 of them under the age of 7. We kept them busy though and managed to not injure any of them perminantly. Which doesn't sound impressive but red rover is a violent game. One poor little one got completely clotheslined and went flying backwards but he bounced right back up. Which is good because his mother was laughing too hard to be helpful. =)
The basketball game was pretty lame this year. My dad and his brothers are getting old and injured and my brothers are both injured and lots of the cousins had their own kids to watch. We still had enough for a full court game but not many subs and it was pretty poor quality. Me and Eric were teaching people to throw a flick so maybe we'll be able to start an ultimate game at some point. If we teach them when they're young, they'll be ready for the ashcroft wildwood team in no time.
There that was five whole minutes of non-uganda thought. Now to go figure out what kind of food i'm going to bring on the plane.
posted by influx @ 11:02 PM
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